2002-12-12 & 12:06 a.m. : as the ships through to the sea

today was so good

convincing boys to sell internal organs

and listening to mark kozelek (in all his incarnations)

and imagining sleeping with someone. just sleeping.

and drinking wine

and being ignored by a bartender

and watching shadows instead of real people

and being told to please please please stay

and for a moment considering it.