day one

345am wake up, stare at the clock, note that i have been asleep for exactly 2.5 hours. realize that i will not be able to sleep again for AT LEAST 18-20 hrs. realize that upwards of 90% of this time i will be with co-workers. desperately wish cyanide tablets were sold over the counter

430am showered, dressed, freezing and with bags, stand in the doorway of jon's basement and wake him up so he can drive me to the convenience store by the Co-Worker's (who will be giving me a ride to the airport) apt. am warned by jon not to look as he gets out of bed and looks for clothes. mistake grunt as "ok" and catch site of an asscheek. think to say something funny, but let it lay as it is not even 5am yet.

505am am suckered into buying Cool Mint Listerine PocketPaks by their slick spaceage design of packaging and the fact that the "oral care strip" melts in your mouth like rice candy wrappers.

sleepily wish i worked for Beer Frame so that i could write a review of it.

506am remember that i can do this in diary, but then shrug off idea, as it is too early for ideas, and i'm starting to enter "hatin' it", even though i am nowhere near the airport yet.

545am get close to airport and want to start singing "international airport" by the make-up, but then remember my company.

sing it in head.

555am-7am awkward talking amongst myself and Co-Worker, 2nd Boss and 3rd Boss. feel underdressed. watch Co-Worker, 2nd Boss and 3rd Boss completely ignore New Boss, and make no motion to call her over to our little collective. note that battlelines getting blurry, as Co-Worker both talks shit about 2nd and 3rd Boss on way to airport, but now is joining them in their ignoring game. note, too, that they are bad at feigning ignorance.

keep this in back pocket.

feel no responsibility to intervene, as i am tired, and could not give a fuck.

7am on airplane. sitting near 2nd and 3rd Boss. Co-Worker and New Boss sitting a few rows back, too far back to talk with.

find witty flight attendant banter via microphones funny, both in quality and quantity. and boy there is a lot of quantity.

i chalk this amusement up to sleep deprivation.

evidence 1---> ride with Co-Worker also enjoyed and gossip-filled. made plans with him to get hammered at Mexi-Chain Restaurant later in the evening. laughed at his jokes.

evidence 2---> am slightly nauseous, made jokes with 2nd boss about her giving me panic medication.

am not actually panicking, just want tranquilizers.

special note---> male flight attendant has now made eyes at me twice. we have yet to take off.

i blame this on my scarf.

710ama businessman just walked past me. he had on a charcoal grey velvet blazer.

new mission---> somehow procure this jacket.

715am about to take off. this plane goes all the way to kansas city.

am thinking of running away to midwest early.

wondering if lauren will pick me up in missouri. thinking of how to get stuart to kc.

905am in meeting room. lots of golf talk. people being really nice. i am freezing in this big room. why am i never warm? am i dead and i just don't know it?

955am the girl who is giving me a ride home is a "hugger". she hugged me before she asked my name.

i am anticipating a fun ride.

1003am Big Boss just quoted Dubya: "Let's Roll"

i think i just peed my pants.

1020am the hottest boy ever just poured my coffee.

my free coffee

country club help.

free cofee.

i love this place.

11am the most beautiful woman ever in the world just alked in.

high cheekbones, full lips, long twisted braids, wide dark eyes.

jesus.

she's from HR, i anticipate not liking her.

not because she's beautiful, god no.

but i fucking hate HR.

ok, i don't hate them, i hate anything corporate...and their job is to make sure everything's corporate.

i hate anything corporate. yet, i am in this job. what am i?

1105 i just used the restroom.

smelliest bathroom ever.

210pm it is pointed out (randomly) by 3rd Boss that i am a superstar. Big Boss agrees. i get applause.

i feel very guilty.

235pm one of my so cal counterparts has an amazing ass.

i'm not saying who.

240pm suddenly, without warning or precedent, i want a hug.

what am i?

425pm i need a nap like whoah. i can't believe i am still awake.

i do think i am dead.

520pm the 2nd in command for the whole state just said "horseshit".

that is so fucking sweet.

as you can see, as the meeting went on and got more involved i was able to write less and less. the 2nd day i couldn't write notes at all.

then i came home and spent awesome time with my mother and father, which i am very thankful for since it will be the last time before i move to the mw that i will be able to see them.

i watched a lot of tv this weekend, that was really weird.

even weirder, i didn't really listen to any music, because i did't bring my cd walkman or anything and there is no stereo in my room at home.

it was really strange.

i am exhausted. i am sure will write more tomorrow, but right now, that's about all the notes and things i took on my big business meeting.