sort of.

but, clearer than things have been in awhile.

i blame this shift in view on a few things:

1-the Co-Worker has come out from under the cloud of Hangover 2001. he went to a weekend bachelor's party this weekend, and in addition to calling in "sick" on monday morning, he was in the shit-tay-ist mood yesterday. and when that guy is in a bad mood, he is CockSucker #1. but now he is running around, jumping into my cubicle, jumping out, singing really really bad music (today? linkin park. i haven't even heard this band, but he says they "rock harder than limp bizkit". oh yeah? no thanks. i will stick with my cds. k, thanks, bye.), he has holla'd at his dawgs like 16 times in the last hour. which, in a sane world, would make anyone go insane. me? i'm just breathing a sigh of relief.

AND he just told me that his mom has every single episode of miami vice on video tape. and then, he "sang" the theme song.

oh yeah, he's back.

(oh wait, he just said that j-lo's ass is too big.

errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr--get out of the car.

if i could, i would use her ass as a pillow for the rest of eternity.)

2-i have been listening to a cd that she made for me a couple months ago. actually, she made me MANY cds, and i got them all a couple months ago. the first half of the day has been dedicated to listening to them and thinking of her. for instance, on the way to work, i listened to "Tick Tock, Ya Don't Stop", a mix meant to get a person turned on. hoo boy that was sveet. and, i have a confession to make: when Color Me Badd's "i wanna sex you up" came on, and the bass dropped, making my whole car, including the driver's seat, vibrate...well. ahem. thank you lauren.

and now, i just finished listening to the "sad" cd, which is not all that sad, really. because it has "where the boys are" by connie francis and "sad city" by the kissing book.

but best of all, it has "we're having a baby" by the make-up. that song is so completely ridiculous. it's soooo good. it's hard to see how ian svenuvious (or however the hell you spell that crazy name) went from nation of ulysses to...well, no i guess it's not that hard to see. but does anyone else remember when he was Sassy Boy of the Month? oh man.

but listening to these cds make me feel loved, and since i have been missing that girl so much lately, i am glad i have them.

3-my boss bought me lunch from the soup nazi today. lasagna with a side chicken caeser salad. AND a bottle of cranberry juice. i'm not exactly feeling so good that i am loving my job, but i am certainly excited about my lunch break.

i haven't eaten very well the last couple of days...tomorrow's payday and all. so you know, easy well-rounded meals have been a bit scarce. i have subsisted on pasta with parmesan cheese, the ends of some ice cream containers (it takes me months to finish a container of ice cream, so it'll just sit there and soon i have a whole group of half-eaten ice creams, because i don't really have a favorite ice cream, i just buy what sounds good at the time. this week, to fill out some pansy meals i have had vanilla swiss almond, mango, and pistachio ice cream. not at the same time, don't be sick, man. [nod]) peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and coffee. but this lunch, i think i hit all 4 food groups, and it was delicious as well. and FREE.

word.

so now i am laughing (courtesy of the Co-Worker) and i am dancing (courtesy of the Best Friend) and i am sated (thanks to one of the Bosses).

and i only have 2.5 hours of "work" left (UPDATE PEOPLE) and then i get to go home and argue with aol because they keep fucking up my service.

oh, and wish me luck, by the way, because i am going home tonight and i am unsure how it's going to be.

[nod].