'for the singer of r.e.m.'

fucking firehose.

not firehouse, for the mike watt-impaired.

f-i-r-e-h-o-s-e.

this album holds so much memory for me. 14-15-16 yrs old. crushes on the skater boys back when the skater boys i knew were listening to minutemen and firehose and rem and other bands that back in the day, prior to '91 and the whole "alternative" thing exploded all over you and me, were called 'college bands'.

being in my backyard with my headphones on, working in the hot sun, forced by parental insanity to endure hours and hours and hours of manual labor, shoveling, planting, cutting, sweeping, bagging, etc.

i would take breaks and hide on the side of the house, back against the garage side door, slide down to my knees and watch the tape turning in my walkman, singing with ed fromohio and george hurley and the aforementioned watt, not understanding everything that they were singing about and wondering on what these people were like, because they were people somewhere in the world.

this album is really comforting for me, even though it reminds me of a time when i was afraid of everything, every single thing.

and i didn't have a voice.

and i tried with everything i was to hide away from people and just not be there.

but i had music. i had this album, and i had daydream nation and i had the queen is dead and i had closer.

when i was 14-15-16, i believed music was all i had. and maybe that was true.

i swear to god, music saved me.