i am so freaking tired.

last night, for the first time, i watched the osbournes. man, what a great show. ozzy reminded me of my own fumbling father, except my dad isn't so nice and never performs rock concerts. both the kids need to get bent, though i do have to confess to a liking of kelly's pink mohawk thing. but sharon, man, what an awesome woman she is.

i think my favorite part of the episodes was how during the family meeting ozzy got up like 6 times and said "so we're done then?"

like, who has a dad like that?

man, crazy. train.

anyhoo, then i started watching the aerosmith icon thing (as i was in the grips of a holy-shit-i've-not-watched-mtv-in-a-year-cannot-peel-eyes-away-from-screen fit). just to reiterate from last night's entry, janet jackson, you frighten me. first of all, forget j-lo, what the HELL happened to janet's ass? like, it's enormous, huge, beautiful, amazing, wow.

her body is freakily proportioned now..just, whoah. and her cheek"bones"?!?! what the fuuuuuuuuuck doods. like, you and i both know that as she ages those things are just going to get freakier and freakier looking. i can't even really..just eugh.

and bad bad bad choice of necklace-like-thing jj. do not--i repeat, do NOT--do anything to obstruct the view of your cleavage, ever. i am serious, ever. it will draw attention to your freakbones and the fact that your nose is imploding and that your eyes are too squinchy.

and please don't talk again, because your voice scared me.

but i still want to touch your ass. and use it as an ottoman. and other stuff.

but, yeah, i watched like 15 minutes of the icon thing and decided that i don't care about aerosmith, so i left my friend's house and generally did nothing.

that was pretty great.

then my brother came home and turns out, he pulled through and got his plane ticket to return to oakland after driving with me out to iowa. i was completely shocked. my brother's not the greatest on follow-through. so radical bikers, he did actually pull through and now he will come with me on my fantastic adventure across states to the middle of nowhere/iowa/my new home/what am i doing.

in other news, i finally finished another painting last night. i had been having the hardest time getting anything finished, or even liking anything i was throwing on canvas at all. it was like i hit a wall and my budding career as a painting hobbyist was over before it even started. but thankfully, a think i got back on the paint train and before i know it i will be cranking out paintings like it was a month ago.

thank you, sweet merciful jehova, for uncorking whatever it was that i corked.

i have a dr's appt today during my lunch break and though i want to go and find out what that bout with massive nausea was earlier in the week, i don't want to come back to work after. what a waste!! i'm not doing anything anyhow.

it's pretty amazing to realize how little my bosses know about what i do. i mean, when i actually do stuff. what i mean is, there's all this stuff i do, which i am really good at, so it doesn't take me a lot of time to do, because i am really intelligent and i figured out systems to make doing these tasks quick and easy. this is what allows me to waste so much time on the internet, reading diaries, writing email, and etc and whatnot.

now that i am leaving, my bosses are pooping their panties because they realize they don't know how to do most of the stuff i do, so they are wanting to "watch me" do stuff, which won't teach them anything but whatever.

basically, what i am trying to say here is, they are fucked, and they know it.

this gives me satisfaction no end.

i am a bad bad girl.

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things i am not afraid of anymore:

being late

not dressing pro enough

whether my bosses find my shoes appropriate (helloooo slippers)

whether my music is too loud or offensive

getting caught sleeping

getting caught on the internet